TEN THINGS YOU NEVER HEAR IN A BATPIST CHURCH

1. Hey! It's MY turn to sit on the front pew!

2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went over time 25 minutes.

3. Personally, I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf.

4. I've decided to give our church the $500.00 a month I used to send to TV evangelists.

5. I volunteer to be the permanent teacher for the Junior High Sunday School class.

6. Forget the minimum salary: let's pay our pastor so he can live like we do.

7. I love it when we sing hymns I've never heard before!

8. Since we're all here, let's start the worship service early!

9. Pastor, we'd like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas.

10. Nothing inspires me and strengthens my commitment like our annual stewardship campaign!

One morning as John was standing in front of the mirror he resolved not to shave himself anymore but rather he would go to the barber shop each morning for a shave. His pastor was also his barber. As he entered the barbershop he noticed his pastor was not there only the pastor's wife, Grace, was there. When John asked where the pastor was Grace informed him that he had taken the day off but could she help him. John said he had stopped in for a shave. Grace said she could shave him . John said ok and got his shave. After the shave he asked her how much he owed for the shave. She said it would be twenty dollars. Wow, said John, He had had a great shave but he could not afford to pay twenty dollars every morning so he decided he would have to shave himself after all. Well the next morning as he prepared to shave he noticed he did not need a shave. This went on for several mornings. Every time he started to shave he noticed he didn't need a shave. After about two weeks he went back to the barber shop for his haircut. His pastor was there so John told him about getting a shave and never having to shave since. I am not surprised, said the pastor. What do you mean asked John. Well ,said the pastor, you were shaved by grace and once shaved always shaved.

This is Our Pick! This is the best value on market! For up to date information that is really useful for the ministry, this magazine cannot be beat. Current Trends and Thoughts summarizes the key articles of over 100 media sources and listed by topic. Articles are indexed monthly as well as annually for easy reference. As a church leader, this is one investment that will more than pay for itself. Save 19% today. Comes with a 100% satisfaction guarantee! CLICK HERE! and stay on top of all that is happening!